By becoming a leader of your life rather than a reactor to life as if it were an outside force, you are taking on the responsibility of being the one to navigate obstacles as they reveal themselves. Responsibility is a blessing because it is the only way to develop into the most beautiful, multi-dimensional versions of ourselves. 

The essence of responsibility is to be someone who looks for opportunities, especially when it feels like things shouldn’t be the way they are. So instead of wishing it weren’t happening, ask yourself who you will get to become in the process. 

Resilient, strong, open, creative, compassionate, unstoppable, committed, loving, courageous, healthy, and curious are some facets of your most whole, expressed self. So allow the surprises of life to polish you so you can shine. 

Or are you checking it off the list?

Are you meditating, or are you just sitting there?

Are you creating relationships, or are you just interacting?

Are you allowing your creativity to reveal itself, or are you rushing to get it off your plate?

Are you prioritizing your family, or are you just worrying about them?

Are you taking the actions to create a new habit, or are you wishing for change?

Are you inhabiting and enjoying your body, or are you trying to control it?

We benefit from our actions when we are fully present in the process and the moment. So it’s time to use your precious energy to really live rather than checking your life off the list. What will that take for you?

Creating a more connected, human culture in your organization, family, or community takes asking the right questions and listening for the most authentic answers.

In general, people aren’t used to being asked meaningful questions from a space of genuine curiosity. The unfamiliarity of such an invitation may cause surface-level responses at first. Your job is to create trustworthy spaces and relationships where people can learn to show up and relax over time. 

As you commit to making long-term change, demonstrating consistency is critical. Show up daily with wonder and faith in yourself, others, and the process. Things can change when you finally become brave enough to discover how they are. 

If you are fixated on something to punish yourself or “fix” something about you, the results won’t likely lead to a happier, healthier life.

So, is it making you happier and healthier, truly? Likely, the things that make you truly healthier will also make you happier. It’s also likely that the things that make you authentically happy will also make you healthier.

It could be that the quality of your life is measured by how joyful and vibrant you feel while living it. Love yourself enough to let these two “metrics” be what guide you.

The thing that is usually blocking us from moving forward with ease in our relationships with ourselves and others is compassion.

When we find ourselves frustrated, judgmental, resistant, angry, reactivated, or resigned, we can use compassion to help us clear the dirt of our lenses and see the truth of our humanity.

Harboring the ill will never help us become whole. Compassion can help us understand.

People need to get their needs met to feel fulfilled. This includes the ability to express themselves fully.

Sometimes, one of the best ways you can help the people you love the most is by encouraging them to find other people to express themselves to or with, either in addition to you or instead of you. This is because we are all so dynamic and need different types of listening to thrive.

You don’t need to be the only person for anyone.

And it’s likely not the best one.

Losing yourself to worry, anxiety, or blame often feels tempting because it allows us to step into a victim mentality, which feels like a safe place because we don’t need to take responsibility when we view ourselves as the victim.

However, learning to own your responsibility (or respond-ability) is like learning to love sleeping as you grow up. The alternative may seem way more exciting initially, but you feel much better in the long run if you choose peace. And not only do you feel better, but you are also clearer, more effective, and more creative.

If you notice the appearance of problems pulling you towards drama, practice loving yourself and your long-term wellness enough to trust yourself and the process instead.

One of the best ways to learn is through the decisions we would have made differently in retrospect. For example, we may notice upon reflection that our gut was telling us something different, and we overrode it or didn’t take the time to consider all the essential factors. These are different from our choices that we deeply know were the correct moves, yet they turn out differently than we planned.

When we acknowledge that we didn’t do our best to make a choice, we have the opportunity to learn a new lesson that no one can take away from us. This embodied lesson can help us avoid a similar future misstep and trust ourselves more. We mustn’t beat ourselves up for slipping up, not only because we all do it, but because self-deprecation takes the learning away, potentially encouraging us to make a similar mistake again. Additionally, even when we are left with the impact of what feels like a poor choice, connections, and blessings have inevitably come with it. Chance happenings that change our lives for the better would have never come to pass without our lack of discernment.

At the end of our days and lives, grace is the answer. It can help us learn from the past and appreciate the surprise gifts we have received.

One of the moat important reasons to know what resonates with you is that if it resonates with you, it will likely resonate with someone else.

So often we miss our opportunity to make a difference through our work because we think about what someone else might appreciate, versus what hits home with us. When we produce based on guessing, the result is almost always missing the magic. When we feel for what is enlivening to us, we generate from a place of energy, vastly increasing the likelihood someone else will feel touched as well.

Nothing you create will ever resonate with everyone. However, if you want it to vibe with someone, make sure it’s moving yo you.

Your resentment will ruin your success and unconditional love will amplify it.

True success is a personal experience, not an external accomplishment. Doing your inner work to create peace of mind is the only way to feel your success.

The obstacles that feel very, very real to you might only be made of doubt.

The good news is, whether it is your doubt, someone else’s doubt, or both, it’s just a perspective, not the whole reality. What if you tried looking at things from the perspective of faith or someone who believes in you?

Your reality changes based on your perspective. Choose a useful one.

You do not have to do anything you don’t want to do. And if not wanting to or inconvenience is the reason, say so. This puts your personal power back in your hands.

Excuses are lists of inconveniences. If you are committed, you can find a way. If you are not committed (there are many things I am not committed to), own it.

If there is something you genuinely want to contribute or receive, you can choose either excuses or actions. Of course, there will always be excuses, and you can use them; they simply won’t get you where you want to go.

The first sensation of letting go, feeling heartbreak, or experiencing disappointment is just that, the first sensation.

The first is always the beginning, not the end. The first uncomfortable feeling is the beginning of a process of a brand new opening of your heart if you stay the course.

Fear of fear is the problem, not fear.

You can feel big things and work with them rather than letting them work you. You do not need to fear the sensations of fear. As you practice being curious about your fear rather than running from it, you may find that the fear that has the potential to stop you is unnecessary; it’s simply your first reaction.

Being scared is sometimes telling us to back away. Sometimes it’s telling us to dive in. Either way, curiosity helps it help us.

What if your attachment to a specific outcome is actually a block to your possibility?

Maybe today, as an experiment, practice welcoming every detour as an opportunity to see what you would have otherwise missed.

The more you listen to and obey the voice of intuition and wisdom within you, the less that most people will likely approve of or understand you.

Luckily, you can still love yourself and love them regardless of their opinions. And, doing just that might be the most important practice there is.

The world needs and wants (maybe if we don’t even fully know it yet) more people ready to switch from a life context of achieving to creating.

This switch for most of us will require a deep unlearning of our addiction to beliefs of lack and, instead, a development of our intuition and faith.

This often feels like the riskier path because it is new. And there it no way you can have the ultimate reward without risk.

The more deeply we discover the depth of our beingness and the magic of the connections within and around us, the less there often is to say.

What if is our job to listen and facilitate, not prove or accomplish?

Obstacles are an opportunity to demonstrate to yourself how powerful you are and what you have faith in.

Remember, your power is your ability to choose how you respond, not necessarily your ability to push through something that isn’t serving you. Sometimes power looks like more effort, and true power also has equal parts ease.

May you have the ease to clearly see the correct places for you to apply your effort.

Habits are powerful. The great ones and the not-so-great ones.

There is nothing wrong with you because you haven’t spontaneously become a devoted practitioner of something new. Instead, you have old habits to break and new ones to make, starting with how you talk to yourself.