Accidentally working on what you don’t want
Consider there is a place in your life where you are doing too much work because you are not willing to do the actual work required to move through to the other side and break free.
You are meant to work, yet not overwork by doing counterproductive and unnecessary work. Why not ahead and do the real work at hand so you can move forward and contribute as much as you can with the time that you have.
Where is it time to stop working so you can start working?
It started with “I can’t”
“I can’t” is meant to be the beginning, not the end.
When you find your mind telling you that you can’t, you don’t deserve it, you aren’t enough, or there isn’t enough, you can be sure that you are being presented with an opportunity to grow and expand through being teachable, curious, and committed.
The thing is, you don’t have to do anything. And if you want to, it is essential to know you can. You have nothing to prove, yet you have a personal responsibility to express and give your gifts if you want to feel fulfilled.
What if you could let your mind try to stop you and move forward anyway? What if you let the “I can’t” be a new beginning?
When the way to do it is just to do it
You likely already have a sense of what to do, and you might even know exactly what to do. And the way to do it, is just to do it.
If you ask yourself, “How do I tell this person something?” The answer is to tell them.
If you ask yourself how to forgive someone, the answer is to forgive them.
If you ask yourself how to begin, the answer is to begin.
If the answer of “just doing it” still isn’t enough, then the answer is courage.
What is it time for you to just do?
Keep the ball in the air
The only goal of this game is to keep the ball in the air. You make your best move and then respond accordingly to what happens.
Your job as you make decisions in your life is to keep the ball in the air, and there are so many ways to do that. Make your best move, be present to see what happens, and then respond accordingly.
The point of this game is to play as long as possible, not to get a particular result. What if you could see your life as this type of infinite game?
Avoiding it won’t change it
You can’t create it or change it if you are avoiding it. In fact, it is creating you.
Avoidance creates us to be stuck, fearful, and trapped. It tells us what we can do and what we are not free to do. It imprisons us in the past, where we must stay the same. You are not meant to be any of these things.
The way to stop avoiding it is to do just that: stop it. And when you stop avoiding it, you get to start being curious about it. When you are curious about it, your creative power begins to emerge. When you are creative and powerful, anything is possible. Add some commitment in there and you will be completely free in the area you were once stuck. It’s ok to be nervous and uncomfortable about all of these things. Let the discomfort repeatedly redirect you to your curiosity and power.
Whatever “it” is for you, what if you stopped avoiding it and started being curious about it?
R-e-s-p-e-c-t
Instead of trying really hard to will yourself to do something, try creating a self-respect practice.
What would you do if you respected yourself? What could you do that would have you respect yourself most?
Self-respect is a choice; it is not something you need to wait to earn or gain permission to do. No matter what your past actions have shown, who you are at your essence is 100 percent whole and worthy of being treated that way. If you take that perspective, your life will change dramatically.
What if you didn’t need to worry about making self-destructive decisions because you always respected yourself? Would you be willing to practice?
The joy of not knowing
If you are feeling down because you can’t see your next step, try seeing it as an opportunity to develop a new connection and a new world of discovery and collaboration.
There is someone out there who can help you see something helpful; you just have to start asking around. Whether it is a colleague, a friend, or a resource like a book or a podcast, connections just are waiting to be made.
You aren’t supposed to know everything and certainly can’t know most things on your own. We are meant to be a web of connections for one another. What might open up if you let go of needing to know on your own, and opened up to receive the gifts of others?
Real joy
There is a big difference between seeking joy and running from discomfort. Many things we were taught to do for “fun” are just a means to anesthetize the feelings of being alive, pulling us away from our essence (which is joy).
There is a new paradigm available. One where life has joy almost every day, and lots of it. One where you become responsible for real and profound joy, humor, beauty, and connection. There is a way of life that is possible where you put your energy into creating life-giving experiences rather than waiting for them to happen, and it can start right now.
Instead of reaching for something to satiate the part of you that wants to check out, what is one thing you could actively generate or create space for in your life today that brings you joy and helps you check in to who you are?
No one else in the world can do it
You are the only person you can be responsible for, so you better be entirely responsible.
This means that you can stop leaking any energy blaming, comparing, gossiping, scrolling, resenting, or resisting. Instead, you can use that energy to own your incredible gifts, discover your own unique timeline, contribute to each person you encounter with your full presence, and have a fun and happy life. Taking personal responsibility means that you own and clean up mistakes when you make them, yet more importantly, it means that you live the heck out of your life, knowing no one else can.
What if each time you noticed your mind trying to manage someone else, you returned to doing the only thing you can do: being responsible for yourself?
Decisions help you choose
There will be many moments today, the next day, and the day after that for you to let go when you feel the pull to make a choice that creates you to be a version of yourself that you no longer want to be.
The power of a decision is immense. It helps you eliminate the options that no longer serve you, shaping your life. The root meaning of the word “decide” can help you remember you are metaphorically 'cutting away’ other options, making the many moment-to-moment choices to let go when you feel pulled easier.
Deciding can take courage because you are taking responsibility, yet responsibility is where your fulfillment lives. If you choose to, you can decide today who you are now or who you are becoming, and therefore who you are not and who you are not becoming, and make your little and big choices from this decision.
Will you fail sometimes as you work towards owning the responsibility on the other side of your decision? Absolutely. This is why you should also now decide to forgive yourself every time.
What would be possible if you finally decided rather than hoping?
The possibility of listening to yourself fully
If you sense you aren’t as happy, effective, or powerful as you could be right now, it could be because you aren’t truly listening to yourself.
Your body is your direct connection to your innate wisdom, not your thinking mind. Your mind often wants something that your body knows isn’t in your best interest. Conversely, your mind frequently won’t let you move into possibilities your body knows are next for your evolution. To truly listen to yourself, check in with your body and see if it is nudging you to move forward or pause and consider something new. If your body is not on board with your mind’s goal, it will be hard to achieve it. And even if you do achieve it, it will not be as easy or fulfilling as moving towards a goal that your body is fully aligned with and moved by.
No matter what your mind is saying, check in with your body. It is leading you down what may feel like the most courageous path, and that is the point.
What might your life look and feel like if you fully included your body in your decision-making process?
You are an index fund
You are only getting better over time, you just have to endure the dips without panicking and jumping ship on yourself.
The downs are part of the up. If you’re signing up for growth, you are also signing up for losses along the way. Celebrate your choice to grow instead of beating yourself up for something that’s supposed to happen. Remember, staying in on yourself is important when you’re low. The growth only happens if you keep the faith.
What would be possible if you remembered that your value was only increasing over time?
Courage is waiting to be asked
Courage is always willing to help you; you only need to ask.
Just like you cannot help someone who does not want the help, courage can only give you its support if you ask it and are willing to receive it.
Courage doesn’t make the challenge feel easy. It may give you support through an elevated heart rate and increased alertness, preparing your body to contribute. Instead of resisting these sensations, embrace them and let them help you.
What if you didn’t need it to be less challenging; what if you just needed to ask courage for help?
Achieving your goal is not about what you do
Your next breakthrough will likely come from what you are willing to tolerate and allow, not what you do.
Taking the action is simple and easy. It is the emotional discomfort that arises concerning the action that makes it feel hard. It could be that the reason your goal is not coming to fruition is because of the discomfort you have been unwilling to tolerate. Once you choose to accept and celebrate the friction, you will be able to take action effortlessly.
What might be possible today if you expanded your tolerance for intensity? What might be possible in your lifetime if you developed your ability to allow discomfort?
Live your life for You
The only one you should live your life for is You. And I use a capital” Y” on purpose.
Your little “y” you might sometimes be greedy, fearful, competitive, attached, burdened, or any other type of reactive. Your big “Y” You knows what is highest and best for you and also knows how to perfectly balance serving others as you honor your Self.
You are the only one who can connect with You and live for you. I am the only one who can connect with and live for my Self. When we all take responsibility for living for our Selves and no one else, we can co-create in harmony even as we disagree.
What would you do today if you lived for You and no one else?
You don’t owe anyone anything
You don’t owe anyone anything except the best, most vibrant, content, grounded version of yourself. Achieving this may mean backing off some of the obligations you created due to feeling like you owe someone something.
No matter what you do, some people will praise you, and others will criticize you. This is different from what you should focus on if you want to serve. The point of this whole thing called life is that we all end up better for engaging with one another, not more depleted and overwhelmed.
Your multi-dimensional well-being matters. What if you gave yourself permission?
Patience or bust
Are you willing to be patient for it?
If the answer is no, you won’t get it. Anything worth having comes through practicing patience, which is the ability to remain calm amidst turbulence. You don’t necessarily have to wait a super long time, yet you must endure the discomfort of doubt, fear, and resistance so you are strong enough to receive and sustain what you are dreaming of.
If you rush it, you won’t get it. If you are patient, it is possible. Are you willing to stay clear on what’s essential as life remains dynamic?
B.S. Detecter
Your body is always telling you when something is happening that is misaligned with the Truth.
There are many “truths,” yet they are all sourced from a quality of love, wholeness, respect, and allowing. So, while there are many truths, they all connect us back to one greater Truth, which is a whole world to discover.
There are many lies, and they are all sourced from a quality of fear, brokenness, judgment, and resistance. Our bodies let us know when we are being exposed to these types of things through the sensations they produce, just like with Truth. Sometimes, the source of the lie is our own reactive thinking about ourselves or someone else; sometimes, it is the words or energy of others.
Our job is to notice when our body alerts us to an untruth and reroute ourselves back to the Truth. Our body is always excited to move back toward the Truth because that is where it thrives.
What could you change if you were present with your built-in lie detector?
Are your beliefs undermining your intentions?
Believeing in lack will not create abundance.
If you want to create something, cross-check your beliefs first.
Powerful over “perfect”
You can’t do everything perfectly. You can’t even do everything. You can’t even do most things, let alone everything.
Your power is in your focus and presence rather than your ability to get everything done precisely the way your mind wishes you could to achieve an unachievable ideal state of perfection.
Since your power is in your presence, your practice is to let go of doing all the things you cannot do right now and do the one most important thing: show up and devote yourself to the moment with love for yourself and others. With infinite things you could be doing and finite time available to you to do those things, it might feel helpful to let go of more and more “shoulds” so you can be powerful in the present instead of judging yourself for being imperfect.
Would you be willing to practice making powerful choices rather than trying to be perfect?