Stretch instead of stress

There is a difference between stressing others (or ourselves) and stretching them. Often, we mistakenly equate pushing someone hard with helping them grow, yet there is a vast difference. Stressing people is placing them under relentless pressure without offering the necessary resources, direction, or support. It often leads to burnout, disconnection from self-worth, and a sense of overwhelm. On the other hand, stretching someone is about challenging them in a supportive and loving way where they feel empowered, valued, and nurtured because you see the best in them and are giving them what they need. Our work is to lovingly guide ourselves and others to the edge of our comfort zones with the assurance that we are supported and the knowing that there is a greater purpose behind the challenge.

When a rubber band is pulled beyond its capacity with force, it snaps - much like a stressed individual. Yet when gradually stretched and given time to adjust, it expands beyond its original shape. That's the magic of stretching someone. We can foster an environment of continuous learning, encouragement, resilience, and validation matched with challenge. We all need to be appreciated enough to expand. In stretching, we grow; in stressing; we fizzle.

What would it look like today to stretch instead of stress? To focus on the long term rather than the seemingly urgent?